The Need

I am done living alone. I am done being the quiet man who puts his head down and simply exists. I need a relationship. Need it like food or water or air. The Need is great, and I can no longer stand for it.

Being lonely starts off as a cold, empty feeling. You feel as if you are missing something, but you can't exactly understand what. Through time this feeling grows until you are choking on it. Every night burns the feeling deeper into your mind. You lie awake at night and stare at your ceiling wishing you did not have to suffer being alone for one more second. After a while the loneliness stops growing. For a while this is a great thing. But eventually you realize that you are simply becoming more used the feeling. You grow so used to being alone that you forget about it for a time. Then something happens that brings it all back in force.

The event that awakens the loneliness could be anything. It can be as benign as walking along a street or as profound as falling in love. Make no mistake. If you spend enough time feeling alone this moment will come. There is no way to prepare. You will be crushed. You will suffer.

From there loneliness continues growing, but now it is far worse. The feeling won't stop expanding until nothing is left of you. You thought you were choking before but you realize now... you are drowning. Every attractive person you see adds another gallon to the lake of singularity.

Finally, you explicitly realize that loneliness is no longer an option. You either start looking for someone or you give up and drown in the pain.

I have made my choice. The Need wins. I will find someone. I will fight, tooth and nail, against loneliness and I will be victorious.